tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4060372686205861977.post3485698507373885715..comments2024-03-26T05:32:30.698-05:00Comments on Tonia Says: (Mostly Nondisabled) FriendshipsTonia Sayshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11406280143637741965noreply@blogger.comBlogger2125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4060372686205861977.post-57084936446676053822015-02-27T12:22:31.489-06:002015-02-27T12:22:31.489-06:00Hi Hilary,
I think, given your daughter's age...Hi Hilary,<br /><br />I think, given your daughter's age (you said her friend was 4, and I'm assuming your daughter is of a similar age) and the fact that it was her first playdate, sticking close by is okay. Frankly, any 4 year olds on a play date need lots of supervision (at the very least, to be checked on frequently.) Your daughter's safety and security come first, after all.<br /><br />And regarding my friend's mom clapping for me. That friend's mom had seen me, maybe a handful of times at school events. She had never seen me climb stairs. She didn't know that I grew up in split level houses and HAD to learn to navigate stairs out of necessity from a very early age. So she assumed I wouldn't be able to. Able people can assume we are capable of very little, which is unfair to us. <br /><br />Trust your instinct. If you (or someone at school) sees your daughter doing something you know she can do, or can do fairly easily, it's not necessary to make a big deal. But if it's something you know she's been working on trying to master, and she gets it? Acknowledge that. Think about...I don't know...when you first learned to tie your shoes... It was kind of a big deal, right? Somebody probably at least said "good job" or gave you a pat on the back. Give her that same positive feedback then.Tonia Sayshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11406280143637741965noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4060372686205861977.post-63276365170895618012015-02-27T06:44:03.985-06:002015-02-27T06:44:03.985-06:00Found my way her via your post on What Do You Do, ...Found my way her via your post on What Do You Do, Dear? I really enjoyed this post. My little girl is just starting to navigate the world of friends--she had her first school friend playdate a few weeks ago (initiiated by the little girl in her class). Since she is essentially non-verbal and non-ambulatory (and very small) it was hard to navigate giving her the space to learn how to have a playdate...but also making sure she wasn't uncomfortable or overly vulnerable to a highly verbal, very active, very sweet 4 year old who is twice her size. The story of your friend's mom clapping for you is a great reminder for me to think about when Ez is with her peers at school (only 1 hour/week right now). Balancing celebrating her abilities and not pointing out her differences is a real challenge for me.Hillary Savoiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11518454468752819000noreply@blogger.com